I Tried to Reach Out

Dear M,

I tried to reach out but I feel as if I'm still walking towards an endless road of despair and frustration. When will it end?

I try my best to talk to you... but you never listen. Why is that?

I try to lower my voice... but even a louder one doesn't make a difference.

I try listening to you first and talking next, but you always run away.

I try talking first and listening second, but you cut through my words and select the ones you want to hear.

I try crying my heart out but that never affects you.

I try understanding what you are going through and explain it the way you would but that's always used against me.

I try saying the hurtful truth but that just gets as nowhere.

I try understanding why you always say you're a bad person, ending up thinking if you just say that to shut me up because it never changes between us.

I try to improve for the better just to realize that finances don't even make a difference.

I'm confused and now I feel like losing hope. I don't want to run away. But what happens when you are the one running from it... how long shall you be calling me a bully for following after you.

I know I come on strong... but I also know that if I will leave this as it is... our relationship will never be the one I wanted for us.

How hard it is.... to fight for what you believe... and not run away....

I don't want to give up... I'm still trying to reach out.

Depressed and Irritated,

Me